How Do You Let Music Influence You?

I HATE MY JOB!

After a long, hard and stressful day at work, I would leave angry and ready to attack. I would pack up my crap, walk to my car and think to myself "what kind of music will make me feel better". I tossed around my options to help me cope with the anger; something hard and something up beat. My attitude reflected a type of music that I thought would make me feel better. I would earnestly flip through my iPod and find the right song. Crank up the volume and let the tone and words soak in. This was my peace; this was my lie.

Jumping forward to a couple years back; I was angrier and more bitter then I had ever been in my life. My marriage was on the rocks of divorce, my Christian walk was non-existent and I had no friends. I spent a lot of my time building cabinets in my back shed. I am a carpenter by trade and could do these little projects when I felt like it or when the opportunity became available. This project allowed me to stay mad. It allowed me time away from the chaos of my marriage and my overall life. I would get home from work, eat and head out to the shed to be alone with my tools and my music.

As I would put my plan of attack together for the project, I would have already decided on a band or type of music. Let me think, something to reflect my attitude... hard and angry rock. The problem was not in the first few times working out there, rather it was when the project needed closer attention to detail and my head had to be free. This was the time when I decided to change my music or better yet, change my influence. This was when my music preference changed forever.

iPod Play: Fight Club Soundtrack

I am a huge fan of Fight Club, and apparently of the background music as well. I had it stored on my iPod so it was an easy option to choose. What was the difference? There were no words. What does that mean? There was no lyrical influence and therefore nothing to sway me to a particular thought or memory. It was just the instruments, just the beat and so much more. This music allowed me to keep track of numbers, sizes and dimensions. It helped me stay organized and under control. This changed everything.

iPhone Play: Pandora Fight Club Radio

As my life turned around, my marriage recovered and my project finished. I found a new love in this type of Downtempo style music. My car rides after work became calming instead of intense and angry. I am no longer involved in the standard copy of music on the radio. To be honest, I can't stand the radio anymore. Most of all, without the words in the songs running through my head, I can pray, I can reflect on ideas, I can get out of the bad things of life and jump where ever I please. I honestly find myself praying so much more and reflecting on the important things in life with this type of musical influence.

Don't get me wrong, I love occasional rock. But my moods and my influence do not depend on what culture is putting out there on "popular" radio. I suppose classical, jazz or other type of wordless music would also work. The point is to keep your mind free for the things Christ has for you and wants to share with you. We should always be listening.


How Do You Let Music Influence You?
Can you relate with this scenario in your own life?
Let's compare and share thoughts.

photo credit: © Sashkin - Fotolia.com

A Husband's Eyes

Do not lust in your heart after her beauty 

   or let her captivate you with her eyes.

Proverbs 6:25

Before I was a married man, I did not really worry about my eyes and where they wandered. I wasn't married, so I didn't think it mattered if I looked at other women. I let my eyes move as they please and find what they liked. There are a few problems with this mentality though and I would like to dig into them a little further.

HABITS> Habits are nasty little things that we often do and get real comfortable with. Habits are one of the main topics when it comes to Manturity and truly handing over your life to Christ; and it's for good reason. Before your married men, this is what you do; it's what I did. The world and all of its "pleasures" are certainly of no help to us as we try to break these habits. From the music, to the movies to the people around us; there is no shortage of lustful influence. But you have to stop and think now. YOU'RE MARRIED! You're no longer that single guy with the busy eyes, and you're no longer available. You have to come to terms with this idea, the idea that you have handed over your heart to the woman of your dreams and she is to be your desire along with Christ. She is the one you are to want, to have and to love tirelessly though the good and bad. Nobody put the words of the VOWS in your mouth and forced you to speak them, you said them willingly and now you have to MAN UP and live up to them each and every day. Proverbs 6 is mentioned above and has many other great points though out the chapter. Give it a read and see where the verses fit into your life. Lust is a nasty thing that we men deal with and deal with we must. Re-access your habits, review your influence and check your desire. 

I had to have a major life check after I got married and realized I still struggled with some of these old habits. I had to learn that my eyes were for my wife and my wife only. I am not saying I am perfect at this process, but with the help of Christ and daily reminders, I am able to stay strong and watch myself more carefully. Challenge yourself if you are struggling in this area or know of other men who are and make it a point to defeat the darkness of lust. I have become a better man because of realizing my habits and a better husband to my wife! Explore your heart, ask Christ to show you where you need help and ready your heart for what He has to say. 

But a man who commits adultery has no sense; 

   whoever does so destroys himself.

Proverbs 6:32

A Consistent Man

One of my first thoughts I had after I really gave my life to Christ was 'I need to be consistent'. If I was going to be a true Man of God, I would need to maintain my walk with Him. My main two ideas were consistency and discipline. These are two traits that most people need for their job, their marriage, their kids and so on. But I knew I had to apply it to my walk with God. I had to come up with a way to make it daily and serious. I needed to find a way to separate from the False desires of this world and pursue God. It took a few months of reading books and praying for consistency, when God brought up the idea of Manturity. He presented this to me in such an easy way that it just made too much sense. He provided all the tools and showed me the opportunity for true consistency.

For me, Manturity is my way of reaching out to God everyday. I make it a point to post to Facebook and Twitter everyday, even if it's only one time a day. A few months after I started Manturity, I signed up on Digg and started reading and promoting articles about other Christian men and more. This has become a great learning tool and another way to reach people and spread the good news of how God is working in other peoples lives and around the world. Although I have not been as consistent with Google+, I have found and met a lot of great people on there and they post a wealth of information. I love to see new followers, comments and interaction on the blog and hope to take things to the next level in the new year.

Manturity has been a way to keep my mind on positive things and away from the garbage of society. As much as I hope it helps other people, it is truly a tool that has helped me refocus daily. It has pushed me to find my real desire and write multiple posts about it. God showed has shown me ways to adjust my influence and find my true identity. He continually is providing me with new information and ideas to a point that I have had to start keeping Evernotes so that I do not forget them. As I run into the new year and chase new opportunities and new ideas, I can't wait to see what God has planned. Truly the most important part of all of this consistency is my walk with Him. I know that He is always consistent with me, but the real challenge and goal is to keep Him first and allow Him to Father me.

With a new website planned, an ebook in the works and many new topics. I pray that you have a wonderful new year and are consistent in all that God gives to you.

Happy New Years!

Are you more likely to Love or to Judge? Check out the new post on the Manturity #Blog TWEET THIS!

Pier Pressure

Everyday we have to wake up and face the challenges of the day. Amongst the many topics discussed in the Manturity series of Influence, the challenge to stand up to and face other men is inevitable, at least for me. I work in construction, building commercial buildings, and for the most part men are the workers. These are a unique set of men and personalities that I have to deal with on a day to day basis, it's part of earning that paycheck. If there is one thing I learned about a year ago, it's that I do not have to take on their identity. I do not have involve myself in their immature, senseless and revolving conversations or influence. I can make the choice to walk away or stay and be "part of the group". I know that I can not change these men, but I can be mature in my decisions around them.
I like to think of this as the work pier. Work piers were made to for one reason. To get the men and the material to the ship. They were not built for pleasure, they were not build to look pretty, but they were made to get the job done. They were designed for work. And like most of us, we have to walk that work pier everyday. Is it something we want to do? Probably not, but it is something most of us have to do and do the best we can.

2 Chronicles 15:7 'Be ye strong therefore, and let not your hands be weak; for your work shall be rewarded.

When I am not at work, I get to enjoy the company of good friends and work colleagues. This is a different group of men that I more less choose to be around. They are friends from Church or friends that are my age at work and men of true strength. This is also a unique set of men. We still have to be careful how our friends  influence us, but hopefully that is happening in a positive way. The conversations are generally more interesting, exciting, funny and clean. I know these men on a deeper level and is a sense, know their heart.
Proverbs 15:13 says 'A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance; but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken. These are the men that you can share your high and low points with. These are the men that you put your trust into and depend on, these are men of resolution.
This is what I call the pleasure pier. Pleasure piers are made pretty much the same way the work piers are made, but they are built for comfort, enjoyment and rest. This type of pier might get built in a scenic area or might get built for fishing. Either way they are a shelter, a vacation, a getaway from the craziness of life. After a long day, it's nice to get off the work pier and enjoy some time on the pleasure pier.

Proverbs 18:24 says 'A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. 

Some of us are forced to walk the work pier everyday, but don't forget to walk the pleasure pier also. Jesus is such an amazing example of a good friend and fellow brother amongst His disciples. If we are pursuing to be like Christ everyday, than our friends, attitude and life will show it.

How do you find a balance between the work and pleasure pier?

Disconnected

It’s amazing how disconnected I can be in such a “connected” world.

As my wife and I drove through the mountains of northern Georgia this past weekend, we couldn’t help the feeling of being disconnected. I’d think of something to tweet or want to check my email only to find no connection and see the “Searching” word in my top bar of my phone. After this happens a few times frustration starts to set in and I tell myself I can try again in a few minutes. It’s also at this point that I realize how dependent I am on being connected to meaningless things and how disconnected I am to God.

I take my phone and set it aside. Instead of having my mind flooded with ideas, updates, and other small dramas. I sit back and connect to God’s beautiful creation. The leaves are turning wonderful colors of orange, red and yellow. The mountains were all around us and went on for as far as I could see. I turn to my wife and see her smile and I smile back. Now, I am truly connected to what matters.

Make time to disconnect from the craziness of this world and connect to the beauty that God has waiting for you. It’s all around us, just look!

Book Review: 'The Resolution for Men'

Up for a real challenge? One that could change you for the rest of your life? Are you sure...?

The Resolution for Men is a new book that corresponds to the powerful movie 'Courageous'. Courageous can now be found on Blu Ray and DVD! In the movie, the men come together at the end to sign a Resolution. The Resolution is document in the film that outlines how a man is going to live his life from that point forward. Check out the document here. All of the men come together in a ceremony, agree and sign the Resolution. It is a way of life, an act of courage and a statement to everyone around you that you are different. And if you sign the Resolution with other men, they are your brothers that keep you accountable ( a way of Locking Shields ).

The Resolution for Men takes the document to the next level. There is a chapter for each point, corresponding verses and a challenge at the end of each chapter. The book starts off in true Kendrick brothers form by saying it is not for the weak. It goes on to say that you will be challenged; you will be brought out of your comfort zone and that sacrifices are going to have to be made. On the other side of that it says that the rewards will be great; the impact will be radical and it will be worth it all.

The book continues from there and gets into "why" we need a resolution. The need to get Fathers back and the priceless value they have in their children's lives. One of my favorite chapters early in the book talks about being a "chain breaker". This was a powerful message for me, as I had to make the courageous decision in my family line to break the chains of my past fathers. The way they had done it for years was just not working for me. I didn't feel fulfilled in life, in work and especially in my marriage. It just wasn't working. I finally gave over the chains to God and the weights of all the past mistakes from myself and before were lifted. From there it's a matter of consistency and discipline. It's a matter of figuring out how to live out the life of Christ and do it as a man should. This is where the Resolution plays a crucial role in a mans life. It's not just about saying you want to live a life for Christ, it's about truly living it out everyday! This will take more courage and strength than you have ever experienced, but this time around God is with you.

A quick over view of the chapters goes something like this: Resolve to lead your family, to love your wife, to bless your children, to live with honor, to demonstrate love, to reconcile with your past, to be faithful and to leave a legacy. The Resolution for Men is a powerful challenge for any man to embark upon, but it might just be the most rewarding experience you will ever have. 

I encourage every man to read this book 

and become a Man of Resolution!

THE HERO!

A warrior of special strength, courage or ability!

Ask someone who a hero is and you will probably get a variety of answers. The most obvious answers might come in the form of Batman, Superman, Spiderman, etc. These are of course all fictional characters that perform superhuman acts via computer technology. Some of them have super strength, they fear nothing and nobody and their abilities surpass comprehension. Many of us go to the theaters and watch these “hero’s” perform and amaze us. I don’t know about you, but I leave those movies feeling more like a zero than a hero. (bad line, sorry).

So the question is ‘What does the real hero look like and what are some qualities that make up the form of a hero?” The movies influence us in a way that is unrealistic. The actors on these movies perform acts that we would never be able to do in real life. As a young man, living in a confused culture, I want to be the hero. I want to be a man of real strength, real courage and have special abilities. But what do those look like in a realistic way? How can we define the ‘True Hero’ living in the world today? Here is my opinion. I hope to hear what yours are also.

>Special Strength: Strength is defined as moral power, firmness and courage. Moral power? I thought this was a great definition. Another way to look at moral power is maturity or the ability to allow you’re self to mature. It is so easy to fall into the false influences of this world, but it takes strength to overcome and rise above them. Strength knows what love is and what it takes to maintain. It’s keeping your cool in tough situations at work. It’s spending time with your kids rather than the television.

>Firm: True strength is being firm. Firmness in what you believe and say. I believe the examples of strength portrayed in the Bible are the best examples to still follow today. The world does not think this way, though they will try to influence us with the new ways. We have to hold firm, we have to be strong. We need to continue to keep the values that have made life worth living. Examples: Although my company might have a value system, the workers may not. We must set the example and be the bigger man when we are faced with immoral decisions. We must maintain integrity and demand it from everyone else. We must teach our children discipline and be consistent.

>Ability: Unlike the super hero moves in the theaters, we have the ability to be a true hero. This starts with a choice; a choice to be intentional in our leadership and decisions. A great way to hold this ability is to ask God for assistance. He has helped so many real heroes in the past and is just waiting to help make us a hero. Our spouse wants us to step up and be the confident hero, our kids look to us as giants coming home to save the day and people around us need a real man, a real hero. This process will not be easy and will take time, patience and prayer.

Its time for men to be ‘The Hero’.

Comment about your hero or what a hero is to you!
photo from: http://www.getnewlife.org/

Locking Shields!

Achilles stood at the front of his small ship. His small team of strong and courageous warriors worked together to paddle back and forth. His desire and determination had put them well in front of the other thousand ships. Achilles had his eyes set on the sandy shores of Troy. The shore was littered with men ready for battle. They had their weapons ready to fire, they had their fortress protected and strong, they were ready for the attack. Achilles and his men came upon shore and the war began. All of the men jumped out of the ship as fast as they could and hurried to get into a tight group. At this point, they were banded together. Their shields were up and locked together. Achilles gave the signal and they slowly moved forward towards the enemy. Arrows were being shot at them, spears were being thrown, but they continued to move forward. The locking of the shields and tightness of the group kept them protected and strong. Upon the call of Achilles the men dispersed and went into full attack mode on the enemy.

The example above is a great illustration for how we can stay strong and protected in our walk with Christ. Psalms 28:7 says ‘The Lord is my Strength and my Shield.’ Let’s take a look at the main points and break them down for today’s world.

1) Courageous: This was not a group of a thousand men; this was very small group of men that had great strength and courage. We do not need a huge group of men to make a difference in this culture, we need a small group of men that are ready to stand up and fight. Men that are ready to face the influences of culture straight on and say no!

2) Locking Shields: As the men gathered on the shore, they used their shields to protect them (the group) from the enemy. We can use the same tactics today to stand firm in our faith and using the Shield of the Lord to protect us. Brother to brother, man to man, we must put our shields together and the attacks of the enemy will not be able to penetrate.

3) Pressing Forward, Together: With shields locked, the men slowly moved forward towards the enemy and upon the signal dispersed! Whether we are in a group of brothers or off on our own, we must keep our Shield up. This will take true grit and strength, but our life depends on it. Any lowering of the shield during battle could result in a direct blow from the enemy. We know he is waiting and preparing to devour..

Having brothers that also carry the Shield can help a man conquer the negative influences of our culture. It’s not a matter of if the enemy will attack; it’s a matter of when he will attack. Be Battle Ready!

Have you Locked Shields with fellow brothers? 

Can you relate to these main points?

Music and it's Influence

The impact of music is everywhere in this culture. The age of just settling for what the radio played is long gone. The time of waiting for an artist’s new ‘compact disc’ might be remembered, but is quickly fading. The rise of MP3 music files, and many more file types, has made music accessible with great ease. And of course the inventions of the iPods and iPhones have revolutionized the whole process (rest in peace Steve Jobs). The industry has become wildly more popular and shows no signs of slowing down.

Because this is such a huge industry, it has a giant influence on people. Artists are full blown stars, popular songs top the radio charts, and some gain a cult like following. We are influenced by the singers, by the beats and especially by the words.

For example, have you ever had a bad day and put on a song that helps you get through that bad day? I use to like new alternative rock music. It seemed to fit my style and I always liked the beats. What I came to find out was that I liked the words and the singers also. Ever find it interesting how easy it is to memorize the words to a song. Now just imagine reading those same words, do you think they would have the same influence? Interesting….  The more I listened to this type of music, the more I realized the power it had over me. I had to hear certain songs after a long day, I had to hear certain songs when I was feeling down and I had to hear them as quickly as possible. The sooner I could listen, the quicker I would feel better. Strange?

Don’t get me wrong, I love music and listen to it everyday. But I have changed who I listen to and why I listen to it. For the most part I play music that has no words, otherwise known as Electronic or classical. I have found this music to still have a great beat, but I don’t have to worry about the words or the message trying to be expressed. I can have my own agenda in my head and work out my own thoughts. I still listen to music with words on occasion, but it is certainly not my first option.

Control your music, don’t let it control you!

Have you found this to be true? What are your thoughts on the influence of music?

Under the Influence

Music, Media, Television, Culture, Peers, Family, Church, Past, Relationships

What do all of these things have in common? They are the things that influence our lives, our personality, our money, our faith and more. We are constantly ‘Under the Influence’. If we are not aware of these influences and how they are affecting us, they can start to control us. They can dominate us to a point that they begin to shape a new identity in us.

The last series of posts talked about desire. This next series is based on the influences that fight for our desires everyday. God will give us the desires of our heart, but culture will give us the desires of this world. The more you let the small desires of this world influence you, the more you become of the world. Don’t forget, we are to be in the world, but not of the world. I know some things are unavoidable in this culture. If we, as Christians, are to connect with the world, we have to put ourselves into the influences. We have to be aware of the popular music, we have to know what media and society are now saying is “ok” and we have to be alert to what the enemy is up to. This, of course, leaves us wide open for temptation. But we have to be strong and stand up to these forces. Amongst all of the worldly influences, we have to allow Christ to influence us. We have to be intentional with our time, at all times. Careful to not allow the influence of culture today suck us down with it.

Let’s explore the ways we are all influenced.

So what are some ways you are influenced? Good or Bad?