Thursday, April 25, 2013

5 Tones of A Husband

Before my wife and I got married, we dated for about six years. Overall we had good communication, but we still had our issues here and there. After a few years of dating, we were hanging out at a little fair one night and our communication started to fail and the night started to get real sour, real quick. As she shut down more and more, I wondered what in the world I was going to do. Do I shut down? Do we call it a night and try to forget about this night ever happened? What do I do?

It was late and the night was already at its end, but I wanted to make her feel better somehow. We sat down on a lonely bench and didn't speak. I had won her a small, stuffed animal frog from a game earlier in the night; when things were going a little smoother of course. I'm not sure how it came to me, but I grabbed the frog and started speaking in a really cute, high pitched voice. I used the stuffed frog as the "decoy" and used this voice as my weapon of choice. After a few minutes of talking in this funny voice, she slowly started to smile. With a "win" in sight, I continued to pursue her. Within another few minutes she was laughing, the frog was a success and the voice became a favorite. God was truly looking out for me that night.

To this very day, almost 10 years later, I still use this voice as a way to make my wife laugh and win her over in "sketchy" situations. I'm not sure where the frog ended up though...

The main point is that we all have a tone. There are various tones that we can use to make each other happy, sad or angry. As your marriage progresses in years, these tones and our attitudes should mature so that we know when to use certain ones and when not to use others. With this in mind, I thought I would break down a Husband's tone into five categories. Feel free to add your own type of tones that has worked or not worked in your marriage in the comments.

Here are the 5 Tones of a Husband

The Regular
We know this voice as our "regular" voice. This is the tone that most people know us best by, the one you use the most and the one your wife probably likes the best. What do I mean "likes the best"? I can tell you that in any situation that requires a real discussion, my wife hates to hear me use any voice other then my regular tone. She doesn't want me to be funny, she doesn't need sarcasm, she wants the real me. Most of the time I will try the funny tone, but I will be quickly told, "I'm being serious"! I make the switch back quickly.

Remember that your regular Tone is the best extension of who you are; it is the most sincere, it is the most honest and it is the most trustworthy. Since we tend to use it the most, we must make sure we use it properly and protect its rights. Would you agree that your "regular tone" is your wife's favorite?
These are important points to remember as we start to explore the other tone options.

The Funny
This tone goes back to the story at the top of this post. I never planned on having this tone in my playbook, but God had other plans. I love to use this tone around my wife when we are messing around, having fun or if I get caught doing something stupid. This voice is a great way to get you out of sticky situations; at least it has been for me.

The real trick with this tone is confidence. Besides pulling this voice out for the occasional family member, this voice is specifically meant for my wife; although, I can see my four month old enjoying it in the near future. Don't be embarrassed when using this tone around her. This tone is meant to lighten up situations, to create some laughter in the marriage and keep you and your wife happy. Happy wife, happy life. Right gentlemen?

The Whisper
I call this the "whisper", but this can also be your soft tone. This tone is most often seen and used when your wife is having a bad day, when you walk up behind her and tell her how much you love her and of course in "intimate" moments. This is another tone that may require some confidence and experience. This tone most likely will pass on the feelings of love to your wife. Expressing LOVE to your wife in your tone is very important in your marriage relationship. She needs to hear this tone and the feelings that come from you along with it.

Men, don't be afraid to use this! There are numerous opportunities to use this tone, with these being a few of them. Get home from work, walk in the door, wrap your arms around her and whisper how much you love her. She prepped dinner for you, you ate it, you walk up behind her and tell her softly how much you loved the food and appreciate the effort she put into it. These are just a few quick ideas; I'll leave you to figure out more... The trick is softer than your regular tone, and more serious than your funny tone. Is the whisper tone in your arsenal?

The Angry
Yes, the angry tone. I would vouch to say that all men have this tone and are unfortunately quite good at using it. The question is do we know how to handle and maintain this tone? Upon first getting married, my wife and I found ourselves amongst a few heated battles. I had very little idea of how much damage my angry tone could affect her. The tone has a much deeper growl, usually followed up with intense eye and eyebrow action, and firm body language. This is far, far from the whisper tone and does not speak love.

This tone really doesn't take much confidence to pull off; in fact it's probably easy for you to do. Maybe, too easy. This one on the other hand takes maturity and self control. A man needs to learn what his trigger points are and discuss these points with his wife. It will also help if the wife doesn't intentionally set off those points. When these heavier emotions and tones are shifted into high hear, a man needs to quickly learn to gain control and tone down the situation. Realize that the REGULAR tone may be better suited until the situation can get under control. Are you able to control your angry tone?

The Silent
Yes, I titled this last tone as the "silent" tone. It's amazing that the worst tone a man could possibly use in marriage is, well, no tone at all. In a sense, this tone is a step above the "angry". This tone tends to come into play when a husband feels ultimately disrespected and no longer thinks his words matter in the situation. What tends to come from this? More silence. A husband could take this tone and go for days and days without speaking to his wife in any way or legitimate form. Sure hi's and bye's make it, but the depth is gone. This tone can be just damaging to a marriage, when just a real conversation in your regular tone could start the process of resolution.

I struggled with this tone a ton early in my marriage. I would do something wrong, my wife and I would go at it; I would bite my lip and listen. After my lip was sore and the conversation moved nowhere, I'd enter into silent mode and be stuck there for weeks. Men, this is not resolution and accomplishes nothing. Man up, speak up and lead your marriage to resolution. Can you relate to the Silent tone?

The 5 Tones of a Husband. What do you think?

Can you relate to each of these tones in your marriage? 

Share another tone or a situation in your own marriage!

photo credit: © itestro -

Monday, April 22, 2013

Jesus Never Failed Me

I was recently challenged to share my testimony at my home Church. I felt that God was calling me to share my story of how Jesus never failed me. I shared my story there and now I share my story with you today.

In February 2007, my first wife left me. Needless to say, I was devastated and I blamed God for allowing me to feel so much pain. I got angry and started running away from Him by doing anything I could to help me feel better. I quit going to church. I was drinking every day. I hated Sundays because most bars were closed. I was with many women trying to fill the void that my ex-wife had left. I even cheated on a girlfriend because, even though she wasn't giving me any reason to think so, I assumed she was cheating on me.

People who knew me before said that I was a completely different person and for a year and a half, I just kept trying to please myself.

Fortunately, one summer day in June of 2008, God pressed this question on my heart, "Do you really want to live the rest of your life this way”? I instantly remembered that everything I was doing was a waste of time and that I would only find INSTANT satisfaction. The only way I would ever be TRULY happy again, was to re-dedicate my life back to Christ and allow Him to heal my broken heart. I didn't immediately stop doing the things that I was doing wrong. But over a period of several months, God helped me eliminate the things that were hurting my relationship with Him.

By January of 2009, I was feeling God’s healing as I was alright with being alone. I didn't "need" to have a girlfriend and I was enjoying the single life and depending on God for my happiness. Amazingly that same month, God introduced me to my current wife. For 6 months we hung out frequently, but I kept telling her that I couldn't date her because I needed to "be alone". June 4th, 2009, I felt like God was telling me that it was alright and that I was ready for a relationship. So I asked her if she was still willing to date me. We've been married since July 27th 2010.

God showed me His mercy by protecting me when I was running. He spared me and other people by keeping my car on the road when I was driving drunk. He kept me from diseases or having children with random women. And He saved me from Hell by dying on the cross for all my sins. NOW, He's showing me His Grace. He promises me eternal life with Him even though I'm far from worthy. He's blessed me with a beautiful wife, who pushes me every day to do more than just sit around and play games. He blessed me with an amazing step daughter when I re-married. He blessed me with an adorable daughter of my own just 15 months ago. He blessed me with a wonderful foster daughter 4 months ago. And just 2 days ago on April 10th, 2013; He blessed me with my first son. He gave me the family I had desired all along, even though I had rejected Him out of anger for something He didn't even do.

We named our daughter Gianna Grace because Gianna means "God is gracious". And we named our son Micah Giovanni because Micah means "Who is like God”? The answer to the question is (emphatically) "NO ONE”!

This is my story.


Share some ways that Jesus has never failed you.

Photo credit: © Paolese -


This was a guest post by a good friend of mine from High School. 
I recently saw his testimony posted on his Facebook 
and requested that he share it on the blog.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Tech Check

It's hard to fight off distractions on the computer when, for the most part, we have to be on them so much. At work we may have to sit behind them all day or for most of the day. Our Smartphone, for most, has become an extension of who we are therefore used more then ever before. Technology has been a huge blessing, but also a huge curse and how you use it might say a lot about who you are and what you find important.

How can technology be a blessing? We, as husbands can have almost instant access to our wife and our children. We can keep in touch with friends better and stay close to extended family. Letters might still be a classic and cool way of sending messages, but it's been a dying art of communication for years now. Things have gotten much faster, and we demand answers much faster. We can reach a wider audience for Christ. One lone person, say writing a blog, can impact thousands across the world with a simple tweet, Facebook message, or blog post. 
The men over at "Fearless Men" mentioned how much more efficient we are with all of this technology. There are wonderful things that tech has brought us and we should be thankful to be alive in a time like this.  How have you found technology to be a blessing in your life?

How is technology a curse? Impossible! Yeah, I don't think so. With instant access to so much, those relationships that we can stay in touch with the most can start to fall. How? Spending time with your friends and all just hanging out on the phone. Arriving at home to your spouse after a long day of work, sitting down on the couch and watching television for the rest of the evening or checking "status updates" all night. Because the latest updates on Facebook are more critical than your relationship with you wife...?? Easy access to whatever you want to look at, whenever you want. This can get ugly. Men, we must keep our minds pure and our desires on Christ! How about dependency? Have you ever had your cable go out, your computer breakdown or your phone screen crack? What do you do? How do you feel? Completely helpless? If so, you are too dependent on your tech and maybe it's time for a break... Don't worry, I am guilty on every charge brought up. So how have you found technology to be a curse?

What to do?

Sounds simple enough, but you have to first be willing to take that step and then follow through consistently, over and over and over again. This is part of discipline, this is part of growing in maturity and this is essential to understand on your quest to true manhood. Have set nights where you and your wife turn off the phones, TV, pads or whatever and spend actual quality time together. Do a devotional. Pray together. Get creative...

Having trouble staying honest and pure on your devices? Again, set boundaries. If you feel the urge coming to view things you know you shouldn't, don't give in! I repeat don't give in. By this time you probably know your weak spots, so have a plan in place. Plan to go running, open up your Bible, turn off the device or pray. Be ready, don't play dumb and act surprised. Check out the some of the powerful resources from the Men at Know your boundaries!

At the end of each month I have a reminder to off on my phone and computer. For three days, I’m reminded why I need to stay consistent, what my boundaries are, why I don't want to go back to my old ways and why I want to stay faithful to my wife and Christ. Again, this goes off every month. 

You can do this too on your phone, work computer or something. Set up a daily reminder to pray. Setup a weekly reminder to read your Bible and set up a monthly reminder to remind you of what's most important and why! Share a calender with your wife and have set times to do a devotional. Every Thursday night maybe? No TV Tuesday night possibly? Just try it. Keep the tech a blessing!

Remember a good soldier is always ready for Battle. A great Pastor is always ready for the Sunday message. And a good, honest, mature Christian man is always ready to defeat the Enemy. 

Have you had a Tech Check lately?
Maybe you should.  

Share what has worked for you or if you need a checkup.

photo credit: © alphaspirit -

Monday, April 15, 2013


“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.” - 1 Peter 5:10.

I am by no means a perfect man. Some days it would be hard to call me good. I have my daily struggles. Some days I come out on top of those struggles, some days I don’t. But by the grace of God, I am able to get up every morning and start another day anew.

How I have come to know Christ hasn’t been very spectacular. There haven’t been any near death experiences, any major crises that opened my eyes to the Lord. It has been more of a slow build up. Like God has always been there, just waiting for me to make the turn toward him. And I believe that he has always been there, watching me make mistake after mistake, seeing me miss clue after clue. Each time he has shown me the kind of grace that can only come from the Lord himself.

Like it says in 1 Peter, “…after you have suffered a little while…” we will be restored by his grace. Like I said before, I haven’t had to suffer very much. I have been incredibly fortunate to be brought up in a home with loving parents who are still together. I am happily married to the love of my life and my best friend. Life has been pretty good to me. So the suffering that is talked about in that verse, at least for me, has been internal. I’ve always known about God. I was raised in the church. But I had never really known him. And at a certain point in my life, I think I was about 21 and getting close to graduating from college, I could tell that something was missing. I would come home on weekends and go to church with my parents and just sit there thinking, “Why do I feel like this? Why do I feel empty?” And after struggling with these feelings for months, God showed up in the form of a guy. This guy had come to our fraternity chapter meeting saying that he worked for the campus ministries program and he wanted to start a small bible study with anyone in my fraternity who was interested. Needless to say, this had “work of the Lord” written all over it. So I decided to jump in. And when I did, it was like my eyes had been opened for the first time. He told us that being a Christian is more than just going to church, being a nice guy, and following the rules. To be a follower of Christ means having an active, fulfilling relationship with him, and that the Lord wants us to pursue him and to love him as he pursues and loves us.

And it was then that the void that I had began to fill. I realized that no matter how much I screwed up, he will always love me. That if I would confess my sins to him, he would forgive me. And to know that there is someone who loves me that much, someone that shows me that much grace…it makes serving him on a daily basis that much easier.

As I said at the beginning of this post, I am not a perfect man. None of us are. And we must strive to become more like him every single day. We must strive to be better friends, better husbands, better fathers, and better men. And without the grace of God, we’re dead in the water. It is a daily struggle, but with the Lord on our side, there is nothing that can defeat us.

How did you come to know Christ?
Was it a slow build or a sudden jolt?

This was a guest post by Caleb Reeves
Caleb lives in Spanish Fort, AL. He spends his time with his beautiful wife and two dogs, doing as much fishing as possible and living life one day at a time. He is taking each day as an opportunity to become a better man of God.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

God Forbid, I Joined A Church...

I recently told a good friend of mine that I was attending a Baptist church. His first words were, “But they don’t believe so many things.” You have to understand that I am a full fledged charismatic/ Pentecostal born again man. To make matters more interesting for him, I shared that at one of the services, a lady heard me signing during the praise and worship service, and thought that I had an angel’s voice.  It turned out that she was the choir director and lovingly persuaded me to join their choir. By the time I was finished talking to him, he didn't know what to say. See, I was the guy who lifted up his hands during worship, spoke in tongues, and even occasionally ran down the aisle. Get the picture? Reflecting on this friend’s reaction inspired this post.

“And He said to them, go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned.” Mark 16:15-16.

When Christ told his disciples to preach the gospel, He never said anything about going to preach to dudes because they will be baptized with the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit. Jesus never said, “ And their denomination shall be called...”. Nowadays, we have segregated ourselves into so many man-made doctrines, and it appears that many of us have forgotten the simplicity of the love story of Jesus Christ.

When I received Jesus as my Lord and Savior, I did it alone. I heard no voice saying, “Go ye join the Pentecostal, Baptist, Charismatic, Lutheran and so forth movements.” No, I was redeemed, and the angels in heaven threw a party for me. The angels were not concerned about what denomination I would gravitate towards. They were parading and rejoicing about my decision. Let me be very clear that there is nothing wrong with any these man-made doctrines. It boils down to personal preference.

If you look at history, you will find out that many wars were started by Christians factions, not unbelievers. Fighting for power or whose perspective they thought was best to follow.  Nowadays, our wars are more subtle since we have become so civilized and educated. We see even in the church, we have become so politically correct. Some of us are fighting against ourselves all the way to the chapel because of doctrinal ideologies. When we present ourselves before the Lord, He is not going to ask you what doctrine you followed. He is indeed going to ask you, did you know my Son as your Savior.  The enemy does not have to spend any effort here since we have now become his biggest ally.

“There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all, and in you all.” Ephesians 4: 4-6

This is a fact, all “Christian” doctrines point in one direction, Jesus as the only Savior. Our command is to love one another, not to separate ourselves into so many different entities. We are supposed to be One Body.  There really is no time for anything else, but to cheer each other on through the best race there is.

So are you still stuck following 
doctrines and ideologies or Jesus? 
Share in the comments below.

This is a guest post by Rick Cubas. He is a wild at heart kind of guy who is married to a wonderful woman and is a father to three beautiful little girls. He owns a Farmers Insurance Agency in Houston, TX.  He is a changed and redeemed man, who had an ocean for a backyard as a child and never imagined he’d grow up to become a friend of God. Check out his other posts here!

Monday, April 8, 2013


Being young doesn't make you invincible.

Being old doesn't make you mature.

Being a man doesn't make you stronger.

The enemy knows you better then you think. In fact the Enemy knows you so well because he knows your father, he knows your Grandfather, he knows your Great Grandfather and he knows your Great-Great Grandfather. Get the idea?

It does not matter how young you are, how smart you think you are, how mature you think you are, how strong you think you are; he still knows you better then you could ever imagine. Don't think you can outsmart someone who has so much to work from in the past.

Evil is his game. 

Confusion is his poison.

Regret is his satisfaction.

Are you ready for him?

Where should you be ready? Well he likes to show up when your getting you're morning coffee, clothed in long blonde hair and tight pants. He knows from experience that this similar type of woman made your Grandfather fall, so he moves in and tries the same tactics with you. He just sits back and watches. Are you ready? Are you strong enough?

Where should you expect it? He loves to show up as an innocent link on your computer. He knows all to well that you are attempting to become a PURE man and he wants to try to win you back with a "subtle" hint or that first look. It's worked on you before, why wouldn't it work again. Were you expecting it? Were you ready for it?

Where could he blindside you? Your marriage seems to be going great when out of nowhere things start to go a little crazy. The money is tight, the trust just isn't there, or you said something unloving without even knowing it. He knows how well these situations have worked and destroyed many marriages and sits back with an evil grin hoping it will also destroy your marriage. Is your marriage strong enough to handle something like this? Is it ready?

TAKE A STAND! Again, never be overly confident and think, "This stuff will never happen to me". The enemy has his ways, many ways, and he has most likely already used them on you. Maybe you noticed, maybe you didn't; but either way he is lurking and waiting to attack. He knows about every man from previous generations, he knows the men in your family and he knows you. This is your warning! Be Ready!

"Like a lion in cover he lies in wait. 
He lies in wait to catch the helpless; 
he catches the helpless and drags them off in his net." 
-Psalm 10:9

Thursday, April 4, 2013

5 Reasons Why Your Marriage Needs Church

Congratulations you're married! 
You will never need help from anything or anyone ever again!

You're crazy if you believe that for a second, but I would think that a lot of newlyweds or early married couples think in this kind of way. Why? Sometimes marriage can make people think that the amazing person they just married will be their answer to life's problems. The reality? Without help, new marriage will suffer and suffer quickly! Problems will arise out of the smallest things and tempers will get worse over time. Welcome to marriage.

Although my wife and I grew up in Christian homes, went to Christian schools and attended a home Church; we had a terrible time going to Church together after we got married. We had just moved to a new area and really didn't know anybody. We thought that we would be enough for each other to handle anything life could throw our way. We managed to meet a few local people and establish friendships, but we were still missing the solid foundation that only Church could provide.

So after living life according to our terms for the first few years and almost getting divorced a couple times, we thought it might be time to see what having a home Church would be all about. We got online one day, found a really close Church to our house and agreed to try it out. We liked it. Although even after a year or so, we were still not attending regularly. We were trying to give God about half of our marriage and we still struggled in multiple ways. You know, you become the couple that looks and acts like they have it together, but ultimately the relationship could fail at any moment. Anyway, we finally agreed to take a stand in our marriage and attend a Church full time. It honestly transformed our marriage, our individual lives and our relationships with Christ.

So now that we know, here is why you need to know.

Here are 5 Reasons Why Your Marriage Needs Church

1) Great Community

Isolation in early marriage is the wrong idea, but that is typically what happens. It might have even started happening when you were dating and started removing yourselves from other groups and friends so that you could be together more. Church is great way of joining in with a community. In our experience, we have found most of the people to be very helpful and accepting. Most Churches will have a visitor area where you can introduce yourself and your wife. This should be the time when you find out about the next step.

2) Join Small Groups
The Church can provide a great way to meet new people of any age, but a small group or class will help you dial in with people your own age. I can't speak for every Church, but our Church will have a marriage group going on throughout the year. You might find some classes that are held at the Church like "Love and Respect" or "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage". Or keep an eye out for groups that meet at their houses. Our local group of young and married will meet up to hang out together, pray together, play games  together and just discuss whatever is on our minds. These groups will help you and your spouse realize that you are not alone in this crazy marriage dance and will offer great tools and resources for whatever problems you may be facing.

3) Relationship Discipline
Wouldn't it be easier to wake up Sunday morning and turn on TV or just sleep in? Sure it would, and I think we can all agree on that. But this is your marriage and if you want it to be as successful as possible, you are going to need to mature and get God involved. Don't wait to decide to go at the last second, let it be known the day before and show some excitement. Don't just slap on an old pair of jeans, rather put on some nice clothes. Schedule a small coffee date or something for after the services with your wife or with a few of your friends from Small Groups. Attending Church weekly will birth maturity and discipline in your marriage and it will make a positive impact in other areas or situations in your marriage.

4) Knowledge of God
Don't just go to Church for the small groups or community, but make it a main goal to go for the lead sermon or message. Small groups are typically more about a theme like marriage, faith, manhood or something like that. The main service is a place to learn more about the Bible and Christ. There may be a theme, but it will most likely be on a subject that you have never heard before. Don't check out at this point, rather grab a pen and take some notes (Click here to learn more about why Men should takes notes during Church). Take in what the Pastor is preaching about and find ways to apply it to your life, marriage, friendships or work. Write down a couple questions and discuss the message topics with your wife afterwards. She may have heard things that you did not and it will make for great conversation. The main sermon will offer you the diversity you need in your Christian walk.

5) Mentorship
While going through some issues in our marriage, my wife and I finally decided to seek help. The Church we attend has a great marriage program where older married couples make themselves available to help out younger or struggling couples. We were paired up with a great couple that would come over about once a month and just talk with us. After awhile, we started to become great friends and actually started taking small vacations with them along with other friends from the Church. If we would have never made ourselves open to doing this, we would have missed out on some great friends and some awesome opportunities. Take a bold step and find a marriage mentor!

Are you ready to lead your Marriage?
What are some ways you have found 
Church to be essential in your Marriage?

Monday, April 1, 2013

To Love or To Judge?

That is the question that Christ has challenged me with lately.

Fortunately, Jesus answers the question quite clearly in the Book of Mark. In verse 30 he tells us how we are to love God and in verse 31 he tells us how to love others. Both of these top commandments relate back to LOVE.

  • "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. verse 30
  • "The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself." verse 31
Unfortunately, this is not always the easiest thing to do.

So here is the Deeper Question: If we have struggled with something in the past and have overcome it; does that give us the power or right to judge someone who is going through that same or similar situation now? Or are we to love?

For those that read have regularly read this blog, you'll know that I haven't always been in the best position with Christ. It took me many years to get to where I am now, and it took a few rough years of early marriage to really whip me into shape. I struggled with addictions; I pushed against the teachings of Christ and did whatever I could to never let myself get to close to Him. What was the price I almost paid for this selfishness; divorce, loneliness, bankruptcy and probably jobless. To this day I still look back and wonder how I could have strayed so far.

The question above has recently started making a bigger impact on my life. How? I have had to experience men that I have known for a long time, travel down the path of divorce and loneliness. They have chosen to live the life or take the path that I could have almost taken. Attempts have been made to help or assist them in making the right decisions, but they ultimately make their own decisions. I have had to listen to their lies, their excuses and about their new/ false life. How have I reacted? Sickened; almost broken. My spirit comes alive inside me and in one scenario mourns for their decisions, but in another becomes enraged in their latest actions! Am I to somehow show love to someone who is doing this? Do I have to because I at once also struggled? Or do I go at them with every tool I have in my belt? Judging their every choice!

The reality is that Jesus makes it quite clear that we are to LOVE. Maybe my hard time with talking to people going through similar situations is simply my own guilt. I don't feel like I have any right to express my opinion. But the other side of me says that I have been redeemed by the forgiving grace of Christ and that if approached correctly, my words will come across as love instead of judgments. 

I don't think it will ever be easy, but I suppose Christ never said it would be easy. We have to remain faithful and believe that Christ will reveal to us the words to say to whomever we encounter.

So what do you think? 
Are you more likely to love or to judge?
Share your thoughts or a similar story.