Man Up Leadership!

Have you heard of Man Up Leadership?

Man Up Leadership is an app for your phone or for your browser. The app was released at the beginning of this year and is growing quickly. What makes the app so great and effective? It consists of the four following categories:

RESOURCES - CHALLENGES - HURDLES - ADVENTURES

The resources section contains powerful articles and videos that are written for men and by men. The Manturity Blog joins the ranks of Blog of Manly, My One Pursuit, FiveStarMan, Fearless Men and many more! The Challenges section is led by founders Josh and Tyler. The two men put out a new video every Monday that contains a serious challenge for all men to step up and accomplish! The Hurdles section is the heavy hitter on the app. Any man can write about whatever he is struggling with, needs advice about or if he needs some prayer support. 

As stated above, the Manturity Blog posts will now be featured in the Resources section on the app. It has been amazing to see how God has blessed the Blog since it's inception. This partnership is just another example of God showing me how faithful He is and continues to be. 

I would love to hear if you have downloaded the app and hear what you think about it. Do you agree that this could bring real change to the men of this culture or world? 

Click here to learn more about Man Up Leadership!

stand up and LEAD!

"YOU DON'T HAVE A CHOICE!"

These were my final words at the end of my plea to my buddy sitting reluctantly in front of me. When your conversations have to take place in a small cafe; your words are only allowed to get so loud. I raised my arms up and put my hands behind my head. He lowered his head to his lap and put it in his hands. His marriage was on the verge of disaster and all he could do was sit there...

Hit rewind and go back 3 days.

My buddy proceeds to tell me over the phone that he is done with his young marriage of only a year and a half. I listened patiently on the other end of the line, well aware that this was a familiar call from him time to time. This time was different though, this time he actually sounded like he was finished. Hearing the reality in his tone, I told him that it was time we took things to the next level and meet up. He agreed, finally, to meet up and discuss all the issues. I prayed hard and prepared myself for battle.

Before reaching the almost verdict stated earlier above, we discussed a variety topics and ideas on how and why to save his marriage. He wasn't really interested, but he was respectful enough to hear me out and listen to what I had to say to him. Here are 3 things to review before signing on the dark black line of divorce.

• Review the Background Information: After grabbing a quick snack for the long journey of discussion ahead of us, we settled down at a table and I asked him to tell me about the past. Without hesitation he started out with the word "SHE". Quite frankly, it was "her this" and "her that". I listened to him quietly, doing my best to keep the half smile off of my face. "She never does anything I want or ask her to do." "She never treats me with respect." "She never lets me finish what I'm saying before she jumps in with her own opinion." This went on for a while until I finally stopped him and told him we were going to switch gears.

• Remove Her and Focus on Him: Frustrated from all of the past discussion about her failures in the relationship, I asked him a different question. I asked him what he was contributing to the relationship and to keep what she was doing out of it. There was a pause, a long pause and a distant look in his eyes. I could tell that this was new territory for him. He started out with the word "she" again, and I stopped him in his tracks. I had a half laugh and said NO, what are YOU doing in the relationship? I asked him what he was doing special for her or what he did to help her out. I asked him if he had ever talked to her about all of the issues he was going through. Among a few quick excuses, I continued with my thought and went to the next important point. 

• Resolve to Change You! Not Her... I went on to tell him that I was once told that I am only capable of changing myself; I can really never change anyone else. I can't force anyone to do anything. The only real person I can control is myself. He nodded in agreement, and tried to insert a "but", but I held him off. "Do you love her?" He replied, "yes". "Do you want to stay with her?" He replied, "yes". "Are you willing to do whatever it takes and make some changes in your life?" He again replied, "yes". This is where you insert the statement, "You don't have a choice". I told him to pull his head up and take the lead in his marriage! Talk to her about the issues. Talk to her about the past and seek resolution! Make an effort to keep what you wanted so badly in the past rather than taking the easy route by signing the papers. Don't make divorce a choice and you won't look at it as a choice. The change in you will affect her in many ways and your leadership could bring the marriage back to having a solid foundation! Stand up and LEAD!

____________________________________________________

I am fully aware that this scenario will not work in all marriage situations; 

 but my advice to every man on the edge is to give 
every effort before giving in to the papers. 

Men need to know that there is hope in marriage and in the future of marriage.

 I'd love to hear your story or thoughts in the comments below!

The Intentional Man

Intentionally comes from the word 'intention'. Intention means to do something deliberately, or a course of action that one intends to follow; to have a purpose or a goal. Another great description is 'intent implies a sustained unbroken commitment on purpose'.

I always find it interesting to hear people use words in the wrong context or use them and have no real idea of what it means or implies. Intention is a powerful word once you explore the meanings. I love the last explanation that says 'a sustained unbroken commitment on purpose'; sustained means to bear, or to hold the weight up, or to keep from giving way. Commitment means to pledge or to trust. So in other words an intentional man is saying 'I will bear all weights without giving in, I am able to be trusted at all times and I will do this on purpose'!

I think most men would agree with me when I say we are easily distracted. I like to refer to a dog stopping in his footsteps when he sees a squirrel passing; the dog stops what he is doing and stares or points right at the squirrel. Why do we have to look into the car next to us when it passes? Why are we so easily drawn to the woman walking by us? Who do we let things like sports, drugs or alcohol run or ruin our lives? Why do men not work, yet expect to be paid? Bottom line is we are easily distracted and we are not living the right kind of intentional lives.

'I will bear all weights without giving in,

I am able to be trusted at all times, 

And I will do this on purpose'! 

Living an intentional life is right in line with the theme for Manturity which is 'how a man develops a mature body and mind for Christ'. As we grow in age, we have to grow in maturity and that takes daily discipline. Daily discipline has to be on purpose! Here are some ways you can start to grow in maturity and be a more intentional man.

1) Access your schedule each day.

-What are you doing each day? Really? Are you making the most of your time or is it being wasted away to the TV or things that really don't matter? Write your schedule down if you have to and start rearranging accordingly. Be more productive, give more time to your wife and kids, and spend some time with God.

2) Evaluate your habits.

- Start really paying attention to your habits; like looking at the car passing you each time or breaking your neck to see the woman walking by you. What do you do with your wife everyday or how do you play with your kids? How much time do you give to Christ compared to the TV?

3) Start in the morning!

- Don't wait till the afternoon or until you get off work each day to check your life. Start each morning! Set a reminder somewhere by your bed or maybe in the bathroom. Write yourself a note and stick it somewhere or put a daily reminder on your phone calendar. There are so many ways to help you stay on track, but you have to be intentional about it! 

4) Tell a Friend.

- One of the most important parts of this process is to tell a friend what you are doing. Let him or her know you want to be more intentional about your daily activities and your daily walk with Christ. Keep in touch with him or her and share your experiences whether good or bad and talk it through. 

The real trick is to START NOW. Don't wait! This is where the enemy steps in and says 'ah, just start tomorrow' or 'you're doing fine right now'. I know you can handle it, so be intentional and get started!

The sluggard craves and gets nothing

but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied.

Proverbs 13:4